I wake to pounding in my head. I’m surrounded by coarse sand reflecting the heat from the sun, blistering my
skin. My eyes struggle against my commands to open. I concentrate pulling my attention away from my
burning body, a deep breath, finally a flutter; open.
Around me is chaos: body parts and shrapnel of torn up metal litter the ground. The sand is dabbled with
crimson red, plumes of smoke cover the beach in a tight thick haze. I hear the cries of the injured as I
stumble to my feet.
As I rise for the first time I feel a gash along my forehead. A steady stream of crimson starts flowing as my
heart starts pumping blood, people call out to me as I stumble to the forest that seems miles away. I see the
refuge of cold shade, the forest…
I’ve found a cave, it is the cold in a world of fire. The beach is already beginning to stink, I tried going back…couldn’t.
I wake to the sound of cracking in the forest, it still feels foreign. My senses not sharp; I clumsily climb to
my feet a poorly crafted ‘spear’ grasped loosely in my hand. My body tenses as I wait, for some predator to
take me, sweat rolling over my ash-covered body. But it never comes.
My body relaxes and I touch the wound on my head. Having assessed the damage in my reflection I figure
I’ll escape infection. It’s a proper red hole, my skin left behind on the metal of the boat. I haven’t been back
yet. I won’t be going back.
The past two days I have stayed in my infantile cave, avoiding the stench of dead men, trying to sleep,
drinking from the pool next to me. Trying to survive.
I haven’t eaten yet. My hair feels longer, longer than it should be by now. Beard’s coming in too.
I splash my face every morning, trying to create some semblance of a routine. To keep me sane I talk to
myself, nothing of note, just little things here and there. To make me feel normal.
My stomach’s almost always growling now, a low rumbling bass to follow the melodies of birds and the thin constant rustling of the trees; a fitting island soundtrack.
I’ve taken to going on daily walks, careful to avoid the crash site, everyday feeling more at home. It feels comfortable. It’s shocking how quickly I start feeling at comfortable. I’ve fashioned a bed out of palm leaves.
Still hungry. Still, need food. Doing my best to ignore the hallucinations. I’ll be fine. I’ll be fine.
Managed to find some berries yesterday. No idea if they were dangerous, didn’t even think. I’ve been tracking a boar, following it around the island since last night. I watch it as it eats, planning in my head a way to get to it. It leads me around the island, teaching me in its own way about how the island functions. I start making a mental map of the island…of Home. My cave the centre point of which the rest of the island spirals from.
I know where the best watering holes are. Sometimes I lose the boar. Not sure where it goes, I’m not the best at tracking its prints. But today, today I am prepared. I’ve been watching it by the waterhole for two hours now. It’s been enjoying itself in the radiant sun. I take a deep breath, it is ragged, hopeless. I need this. Now. Spear in hand, a proper spear now with a real point (I obsessed over chipping away at it with a rock) I charge at the boar. Sprinting full bolt at the creature: my meal. Adrenaline takes over. My body starts ignoring the aches of malnourishment, my muscles reverting
I take a deep breath, it is ragged, hopeless. I need this. Now. Spear in hand, a proper spear now with a real point (I obsessed over chipping away at it with a rock) I charge at the boar. Sprinting full bolt at the creature: my meal. Adrenaline takes over. My body starts ignoring the aches of malnourishment, my muscles reverting
(for a second) to their former strength. This is my moment. As I get close the boar turns. Unmoving and
unafraid it stares me in the eyes; an unblinking mass of grey and I…
Momentum gets the best of me pushing me off balance and I tumble towards the ground. Reopening the head wound. Scraping my knees like a schoolboy on the pavement. I lie there, for a second listening to the boar charge off into the scrub. The adrenaline leaks out of me, slowing being replaced by hopelessness. Defeated tears force their way out of my dry eyes, filling in my cracked skin. Slowly I turn over, my body wracked
with empty sightless sobs. I lie there staring at the sky, a blue mass of promise. My lungs burning, ribcage expanding and contracting.
Waiting. Waiting. Waiting.